White Flight and Ferguson Revisited; Isn't it Finally Time for Change? authors danah boyd and Robert P. Jones

My thoughts after reading danah boyd’s enjoyable, enlightening piece.

 So, kids still separate into groups or cliques like they’ve always done once they reach puberty, if not sooner. By then they know who they feel more comfortable with, who shares common interests and values, and establish themselves—to some extent—within a group of peers. This is normal and expected; as a teen, it is essential to identify with others who not only think but also feel the same about important “teen” issues—boys/ girls, dating, sex, drugs, sports, school, clubs, music (STOP ME PLEASE!) Now, these are often kids from similar backgrounds, families, religions, locales, expectations and rules, which is not unusual either. BUT, if kids are purposely labeling specific groups as the “other” it suggests they are voicing perceptions of their society. Sadly, but not always, this begins with parental suggestions, but when that is not the springboard, the actions and reactions of their peers—who they identify with—help to create this self-segregation process.

The idea of moving from one social media network to another is comparable to my generation moving from AM radio (loud, popular, accepted and endorsed) to the subcultural draw of FM radio (heavier rock & roll, less commercials, coolness personified…). Most teens want to be as “in” as their peers, and now that involves social media choices. Sadly, even they carry social stigma and seem to be race-based to many teens across the country. Luckily for me, growing up in Hudson County has always provided me a diverse variety of friends, schoolmates, and lifetime peers up to and including my present co-workers—my “friends” on Facebook look like a league of nations!

This is a marvelous mix of wonderful people who all have the same beliefs and concerns despite different backgrounds. I never really gave it much thought until reading boyd’s paper. I grew up during a period where segregation was being battled and cheering for its demise was the obvious choice; at least to me, as a young person who saw it as hateful and stupid. Current events reflected this mentality by many—but not all—and the explosive nature of everything on the evening news displayed wrong things going on and the need for immediate change. As an older person who works and goes to school with a delightful mix of people from so many rich, diverse cultures, I still see (on the evening news) so many parts of our country, including people I never suspected, never progressed beyond those narrow minds and wrong things I witnessed in my youth. Racism and reverse-racism is alive and well; I am thankful it does not impact me personally but I look at my children—who I raised to treat all people as they hope to be treated—and my grandchildren, who will be impacted by this lingering stupidity.

Boyd’s essay reflects a certain snobbery among Facebook users towards an implied ghetto/ low-class following on MySpace. Only having joined Facebook recently (2014), I turn to my older son who was that teen who had to follow the popular trends. MySpace was his thing; a cool page with pictures and music UNTIL he met a “girl” who turned out to be an older, LARGER, toothless, white woman in the Pine Barrens. She lured him with false information (and false photos) to a trailer littered with beer cans and trash; he made excuses and escaped through a bathroom window (he was quite trim) into the woods and ran like hell to Route 9 and safety. Despite his comical recount, I was relieved when he left MySpace for the newer, cooler Facebook. Because many teens are like my son was back then, whatever is deemed "newer or cooler" among ones friends/ connections is the way to go, regardless of race, color, or society.

The comparisons listed to compare digital white flight among teens across the nation bears much truth; again, I am thankful my kids were raised in an area where they had multi-racial friends and their norm was diversity. When we moved to the shore to be close to my Mom, (inadvertently, our white flight) we were all astonished at the obvious racial divide in that area. Which brings my attention back to the disturbing story of Ferguson. After following this so closely on the news, I was only a little surprised at the intentional blind eye so many white-Americans turned on this event. What I see is only sadder because of the hard work and sacrifices of many who have fought to break this type of thinking, it nonetheless still exists. Capehart’s column was especially disturbing. As a Mom, but a white Mom, I have told my sons to not talk back to police; this after we moved to South Jersey where we were not members of the “old-boys club.”

That experience was eye-opening and my friends at work, African-American friends, were able to offer advice and sympathy. No parents should have to face those fears for their children and only be able to hope that their child will be “obedient” instead of a responsible, self-reliant young adult. Respect should be given to all and if one loses it through their own fault, they must find how to regain it respectfully. Color, ethnicity, and diversity are what make us a melting-pot we call USA; isn’t it finally time to embrace that?